Time comes sooner than we expect it to be. It flashes with
the blink of eye. Time was running out of our hand. I gradually tried to
convince my mom but every time I tried talking to her about Kartik, she turned
restless and gloomy. Somewhere down my heart, I understood her dilemma, I
understood her fears but she failed to understand my love, our love. Her
matrimonial search was on in full fledge enthusiasm. The happier she used to
be, the scared I used to be with the thought of losing Kartik.
Ignoring the reality, I and Kartik were living the left out
moments in our handful life. The
mornings we spent being each other’s sunshine, the afternoon we spent
missing each other in our respective offices and the evening we spent together watching
the sea, hand in hand till the night dazzled with its brightest star, every
passing moment was like a precious pearl diving in the deepest ocean.
Three years’ time was coming to an end. Just a month later,
we were supposed to complete our third anniversary but I never wanted that day
to come in my life. I wanted to pause the time, forever. That night, I had told
mom that I would be staying overnight at my friend’s place. She very well knew
I was talking about Kartik but somewhere, she felt guilty for not being strong
enough to fight her fear. She could very well see the love in my eyes and that
was the reason she was letting me live the time I had in my hand.
“My mom has shortlisted three guys. One of them will come to
see me tomorrow evening.” I said, trying to sound strong.
“What? We have some more time with us; we can try convincing
your mom even now.” Kartik said by placing the spoon back on his dinner plate.
“Kartik, three years are coming to an end in next few days.
I am going to be 24 next month, mom plans to get me married by next year. I am
trying to convince her since past one year, she will not give up of her fear
and I will not give up on her. She had cried a lot, now it’s time for her to
smile, and if it costs my life, I won’t mind sacrificing it.” I said, bluntly.
He preferred keeping mum and silently ate his food without even looking at me
once. I could feel the pain in his heart for I was going through the same.
I got up from the chair and walked towards him. I stood
behind his chair and wrapped my arms around him and whispered, “I love you”. He
instantly got up from his chair and hugged me back. He hugged me so tightly as
if world was coming to an end and this was the very last time he was embracing
me in his arms. I could feel his damp eyes drizzling over my neck. I could feel
his restless gasp while he silently sobbed under his suppressed breath.
“I never thought we have to see the day we apart,” he softly
continued. “But the day is approaching. Can I make love to you for once?”
“I was, I am and I will, be yours, always.” I gave him the
right.
He gripped me tighter making our bodies meet and making our
soul one. He looked at me while those dew pearls rolled down my cheek, he
kissed them softly while my eye lid closed them self. He softly moved towards
my soft petal lips and we drenched ourselves in ecstasy of that purity of kiss.
He carried me to couch and explored me to the last bit. The first ever time, we
made love. I lost myself to him and I never did and never will regret my
choice.
The next morning brought happiness and sadness for me at the
same time. I woke up in his arms but I knew this won’t last longer. I kissed
him good bye for the day and left for my place. I could see a strange sparkle
in my mother’s eyes.
“You seem happy.” I said as soon as I placed my handbag on
the couch.
“I am happy and you’ll be happy too by the evening. This
guy, Shubham, who is coming to see you in the evening, I completely like him.
He is a nice guy, once he likes you, things would be done.” Mom said excitedly.
“Mom, I love Kartik. Although I marry someone of your
choice, to fulfill your wish, don’t expect me to love him ever.”
“Few years down the lane when you’ll see yourself in the
mirror and see a happily wedded woman, you’ll thank me and you’ll understand me
that day.” Mom consoled.
“What if I see an unhappily wedded woman crying in the
mirror? I would probably hate you that day.” I bluntly said and rushed to my
room. I know the words I spoke were cruel for her to listen but it was getting
impossible for me to keep myself strong.
Evening approached and I got ready with half heart. Doorbell rang and soon I was downstairs facing
them sitting comfortably on the sofa. I haven’t served them anything. I just came
and sat next to a strange family checking me out from the moment I entered the
frame. That guy (I forgot the name) stared me with the I-am-groom look and I
was sneaking from the corner of my eye with
Yes-I-know-it’s-you-as-your-dad-is-too-old-to-marry-me-and-your-mother-won’t-allow-me-to-marry-him
look.
Soon, I was thrown into my room with that guy for the sake
of knowing each other better. He looked at the Nicholas Sparks book resting on
bed, in his hand and started flipping pages, as if he was an avid reader. It
was hard for me to start the conversation. Soon, my patience ended and I
snatched the book from his hand.
“I love someone else,” I said bluntly, sounding like a typical
Bollywood actress.
He looked upward with What-the-fuck look and tried to come
out of the shock. He gulped whatever was left in his throat and whispered “Me
too,”
Now that was shocking. I spent my three hours thinking for
the best excuse to say him no. and he was here with just two words “me too” I
felt like killing him but then I managed the smile on my face. Smile, because I
was not gonna marry this fool.
“So what’s your story?” I asked and took the pillow in my
lap. I was much relaxed now. He narrated his story. In the whole narration, he
smiled, he looked sad and he expressed the every possible emotion he had in his
heart.
He loved some divorced woman and with his eyes anyone could
conclude that how much he loved her. Still, his parents failed. Our stories
were almost same, though Kartik wasn’t divorced. Because of this very strange
similarity our conversation took a base and eventually we became somewhat kind
of friends.
We went downstairs pretending that everything was still
alright. I tried hard to blush but failed. This meeting concluded with they
saying “we will let you know,” and my mom and I waived them.
I changed into my pajamas and lied on my bed. After so much of tension, I was feeling
happy. I was feeling like worth living. I was feeling like our fate would allow
us to meet. I just wanted to talk to Kartik.
“I love you and no one can take you away from me.” I text.
“I know my love. I won’t let anyone to take my love out of
me. I want to breathe having you in me and yeah one more thing… I love you too
Aditi,”
I was overwhelmed and thought of writing a blog post. I took my laptop and
leaned to a wall sitting on floor. I wrote a blogpost with the name “I won’t measure Love in years,
I will measure it in forever”
As soon as I published it, I got 7 comments in micro
seconds. I read the very first comment. It was from the same girl “Shamita” and
the comment was “Please check your Facebook inbox. Please… :(”
I felt like as if she
seriously wanted to connect with me somehow. There was something which I was
missing… I read her messages. She had sent me many. They were accumulated to 43
unread messages only by this girl “Shamita”
I read all her messages and reverted her back and for the
rest of the night I was a reader, reading articles and thinking about of this
very strange girl….
I looked outside my window. The moon was complete and so was
my life. But this moon won’t be complete forever. It would start fading a
little every night and soon it would leave the night in darkness. I was happy…
but I was getting that feeling that there was a long battle of Love, Life and
Happiness soon to be fought. He was my love, now it was time to make him my
life…
-Dhristy
Dasgupta (Blogger at Maple Leaf
)
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